'Lilo & Stitch' is a Dull Success
Has Disney finally done it? Did they remake one of their vault cartoons into an enjoyable live-action movie? The short answer is yes, but just barely. Luckily for kids and parents, just barely is good enough to make the cut. Lilo & Stitch 2025 is mixed with laughs while leaning hard on sentimentality. Depending on the genre, there's nothing wrong with that. E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial, for instance, is a movie written for kids. Still, all ages can get teary-eyed watching it, because of its universal emotional resonance that only Steven Spielberg can achieve. A better example is Pixar's Toy Story films, Monsters, Inc., Inside Out, and WALL-E. Kids flicks with existential themes that make them stand the test of time. Was 2002's Lilo & Stitch a movie with such qualities? Probably not, so its remake can get away with being mildly entertaining. But why not try to improve upon the original instead of regurgitating the source material? Take a chance and go for nuance like Pixar does.
The story begins on an alien planet name Turo, where the United Galactic Federation is convicting Dr. Jumba Jookiba (Zach Galifianakis) of illegal genetic experimentation by creating subject 626. 626 is like an untaught dog let off its leash. Being a danger, 626 is condemned to spend the rest of his life in exile on an asteroid. 626 foils the High Council's plans by hijacking a small ship. 626 then crashes himself onto Earth on the beautiful island of Hawaii. How did 626 survive the crash? Because he's practically designed to be invincible. From the beginning of the movie, you can tell it's meant to be a cartoon. There's not a single human in its opening five to ten minutes. The aliens stem from cute 2D designs that look like a phony 3D cartoon in live action. Was that the intention? To be live action but cartoony? Why not go the extra mile and mix CG with puppets and miniatures? This is a live-action adaptation with Disney's money, so think of your design outside of the box instead of using CGI for everything.
Once we cut to Hawaii, the story plays out like your typical family flick. Lilo (Maia Kealoha) is a six-year-old girl living with her older sister, Nani (Sydney Agudong). The siblings lost their parents due to a car accident years ago, because it's never a Disney protagonist unless the protagonist is orphaned. Fasting forward, Lilo adopts 626, later named Stitch, from the dog pound. Stitch turns out to be a disaster for Nani, especially when she's trying to show Child Protective Services how she's fit to be a mother to Lilo.
One side quest that merges with the main plot involves Jumba and Earth Expert, Agent Pleakley (Billy Magnussen), taking the form of human bodies so they can retrieve Stitch for the High Council. It’s fish-out-of-water humor that's a bit too overplayed. It's funny when actors play the material straight, pretending like they don't know they're in a comedy, like Leslie Nielsen in Naked Gun. Here, we have two guys hamming it up for the kiddies, which is more cringey than funny.
The flick's vaudevillian antics are overkill, with Stitch constantly destroying things throughout the length of the film. Yes, it's the point of his character. To learn how to be calm, but its base-level humor gets old fast. The dialog isn't exactly snappy either. It's cliche with lines like "he's not an animal, he's my friend" that are cute, but bland. At its bare minimum, the movie gets the job done by entertaining a younger crowd. It sometimes feels a bit too long, but not so much so that it hinders the experience. There's a nice scene of peril in the film that creatively plays uplifting Hawaiian music while something grim is happening on screen, which is a nice change of pace from the film's overly convenient script that wraps up in a quick, hurried resolution that doesn't make a lot of sense.
It's easy to excuse every bit of logic by saying it's a kid's film that's faithful to the original. I guess to pick it apart would be like asking how the toys know to go lifeless when Andy walks in the room. As a simple, fun movie for children, Lilo & Stitch fits the bill. For adults, it's not worth rewatching. Of the recent live-action adaptations from Disney's classic catalog, Lilo & Stitch looks like Citizen Kane compared to the others. It's better than Snow White and Pinocchio by miles, just by being watchable. Sadly, that's a very low bar to raise. Kids will like anything. How manageable is the movie for the adults, however? Good enough where it's not torture. Is Lilo & Stitch worth blowing $40-$50 on family tickets for? No. You can wait until it reaches Disney+.
